Just installed Ubuntu 10.04 on your laptop and found out it kills in one hour the same laptop Windows 7 can run for five hours?
Found out you can get the same look and feel as Windows 7 or Snow Leopard by installing Windows 7 or OS X? Figured out the answer to the question “Why does every Gnome theme look like OS X or Windows?”
Ready to uninstall that piece of shit?
Oh, GRUB and Windows didn’t play nice, right? Even if you hadn’t run Windows since installing Ubuntu, it’s Microsoft’s fault your master boot record got screwed up. Yep, they’re so evil and manipulative they can fuck your laptop up without even running their software.
Don’t ask me how, but check any linux help forum for affirmation. Not necessarily proof, but just a shot of confidence when you’re not sure why GRUB spontaneously had difficulty loading your other OS.
So here’s how you fix the minor witchcraft Windows performed on your hard drive (it HAD to be them!) so you can get back to fully embracing Evil on a beautiful, efficient, and stable operating system:
- Turn on your computer and wait for the boot loader.
- Punch your desktop when Grub says “GRUB loading. error: no such partition grub rescue>“
- Remember you have access to an OS which hopes for sunshine (like Linux distros) but prepares for rain (unlike Linux distros) and includes recovery tools.
- Pop your installation CD into the drive.
- Reboot
- Boot from CD/DVD by pressing any key
- Select a language or time zone just like you’re going to install Windows
- Click “Repair your computer”
- Click on “Command Prompt”
- Type “bootrec /fixboot” and wait for the magic fix. Obviously they’re used to Grub screwing things up and aptly named the argument “fixboot” instead of “-h -RR –flag-unfuck-mbr-yes -qq -#$$PP{-::”
- Type “bootrec /fixmbr” just for good measure, which repairs any other possible self-destructive code which ran while windows wasn’t even loaded. That’s how they make their money, by blowing up their own operating system while you’re running another one. Obvioussssssslyyyyyyyyy.
- Reboot. You’re fixed.
